Presented in part by The Shropshire Agency in Lubbock. Independent, just like all good Cat-Dogs.
Scout is one of the Hyatt Family’s cats. He’s a cat-dog. He thinks he’s a cat, but has many dog tendencies. It’s been a while since Scout wrote anything. Now we know why. Sometimes he gets on the writing-box in The Old Guy’s office and writes a column, which he sends to his agent. It’s up to us to publish it. We’re afraid not to… so enjoy!
I’m back!
I took a little time off from getting on the Old Guys Writing-Box for a lot of reasons. But now I’m back and it’s fun. It’s fun because the Nice Lady has created a holiday just for me! Not only that, but I have a new friend and he’s made me realize who I am.
I’m a Cat.
I am.
I’ll explain more in a little bit. I am told by my agent to create drama in my columns so this is me creating drama.
So about the Nice Lady. She went and created something they call Christmas. It is great. They put up a fake tree… really cheap of them, but then they put lights on it and little balls and all sorts of cool stuff for me to play with. The Nice Lady gets mad though when I get in the fake tree. She has the power to make water shoot out of a plastic thing. I don’t like that. Why put up a tree and then not let me climb? So now I just like to sit underneath it. But that’s not all, there are all sorts of little houses with lights and crazy things all over the place. The Nice Lady even put out white stuff around the houses to make it look like here when it doesn’t rain I guess. Did I mention I can’t climb in the tree. . .
So they keep talking about this Christmas thing and now they have boxes under the tree. This would normally be great. I would climb in a box and sit under the tree. But no. They cover the boxes in silly paper. I can’t get in a single one. So the boxes just sit there, and they taunt me. It doesn’t matter though. It’s still fun.
Of course the Dog-Cats don’t seem to know what’s going on at all. Saayyydeee and Indeeee just bump along like normal, waiting for the Nice Lady or the Old Guy to feed them. Of course they stay away from the Nice Young Man’s room for the most part unless he takes something called Waddaburger in there. Then they aren’t afraid of the smells in his room. I am still afraid. Even when I lived Outside when I was little I didn’t smell things like what comes out his his sleeping room. And I lived by a swimming pool and a dumpster in the summer. I try to forget, but the smells…
So anyhow this Christmas thing is great. I love that they put all this stuff out just for me to play with, but there’s something else I have to tell you.
I’m not alone now.
I have a friend.
That’s right. The Nice Lady and the Old Guy and the Nice Young Man they decided I might be lonely because my friend Suuushiiiii went away last Spring. I was sad. For a long time. I missed her. She was a good Dog-Cat. But she was sick and she was hurting and I knew that she needed to not hurt. But even though she was old we got along. We would just kinda sit around each other. It worked. But when she was gone, I was alone during the day because the big Dog-Cats, they go Outside when the sun is out and do dumb dog stuff like chasing the evil rabbits or getting scared by the Owl that lives in the Outside in the Real Trees. He is mean. I like birds but I don’t think we could be friends. I like the smaller birds I can see Outside through the Bird-TV Window the Nice Lady had cut into the wall for me to watch them… what were we talking about? Oh ya, I have a friend.
They got me another Cat-Dog to hang out with this past summer.
He was a really little guy and he smelled kinda funny and he had no real Cat-Dog manners about him. He is all Cat. But I learned hanging out with him that I am definitely a Cat and not a Dog. I just didn’t know it because it had been so long since I’d been around my brothers and sisters and my mom. I forgot how to Cat. Now I know again thanks to Finch.
That’s what they call him.
Isn’t that a dumb name? Finch. It sounds like you’re hacking up a hair-ball. It’s not a name, it’s a noise. I don’t call him Finch. I just look at him. He makes enough noise for the both of us. He is a very noisy Cat. He complains about everything. That takes the pressure off me though. I can let him be the mouthy one and I get the benefit when they put the food out or turn on the Talking-Picture-Box on the wall that the Nice Lady and the Old Guy like to stare at for hours. Sometimes there will be interesting things on it, but it’s mostly just some man or woman cooking stuff or a guy yelling about stuff. I think they call it Fogsnews.
So Finch is now my friend though and I do really like it. We get to play and fight and run really fast for no reason. I didn’t know I was supposed to do that, but now I do. I can also teach him to do stuff. Like watch the Bird-TV-Window and make noises at the birds Outside. I really, really want to be friends with the birds, but I still don’t know that I want to be Outside. The Owl is outside and he is mean.
I still miss my friend Suuuushiiii a lot.
But now that I have Finch I have someone to blame things on like when I walk across the Old Guys Writing-Box and make it do weird stuff that he doesn’t like. I blame Finch. If I get bored and want to get up on the food eating area and see what’s up there and knock something off, I can blame Finch. He’s very handy and hasn’t figured out I’m using him that way. He may not be too bright.
Well, I have to go now. The Old Guy is coming back into his Office and looks like he wants to use his Writing-Box. Sometimes at night, he talks to it, like he’s talking to people that aren’t there. I haven’t told the Nice Lady about this. I feel bad for him.
Thanks again for reading what’s going on for me and Finch and Saayyyydeee and Indeee. I will try and write more now that I’m happy again and have a friend. Even if the friend is Finch. Soon I will tell you what happens to all the boxes under the Fake Tree. I hope I get to sit in one. If you have the chance in the next few days sit in a box you should do it! You’ll thank me. Also, stay away from The Owl. He is mean.
Scout
