Welcome back to another edition of The Adventures of Scout the Cat-Dog. Scout is Ryan Hyatt’s cat. He thinks he may be a dog and that the dogs may be cats. Either way, Scout has a lot to say each week when he gets control of the “writing box”. Here’s his missive for the week. Enjoy!
Have they told you about “cold”!
What ever cold is, I do not like it.
For some reason both The Nice Lady and The Old Guy do not want me to go outside my house. They’ll let the other dog-cats go out and run around. They’ll carry-on and make noise and do whatever it is they do, but not me. Nope. I have to climb up on a piece of wood and watch outside through the hard, clear thing. It looks like you could jump right through it to the Outside, but don’t try. It’s a trick. It’s hard and you hit it and fall back and the Old Guy and The Nice Lady laugh at you. But anyhow… I can sit there and see them run around on what the People call “the outside”. I want to be out there.
At least I did until this week.
So this week something happened outside. I could hear them talking about something called weather and snow and ice. Now ice sounds kinda fun and nice. Ice. See. Sounds nice. But The Old Guy does not like it. At all. He complains about having to get it off the thing he climbs into each day and then moves away from the house. The Nice Lady also doesn’t like it. But I wanted to see what it was like and I finally got my chance.
The Old Guy was trying to get the Dog-Cats to come back into my house and he left the door open. It was my big break. Except The Old Guy moves faster than I thought he could. He caught me right at the door. The Old Guy makes weird noises by the way when he bends over sometimes…
But then, it got fun. He took me to the Outside!
He was yelling at Suuuuuusheee and Saaaaaaaaydeee and Indeeeeeee and trying to get them to come hang out with me I suppose, but there we were. Outside.
And then I learned about cold.
Remember, I’m still a young guy. Born at night, but not last night. Still, I was hanging out by a swimming pool when The Nice Lady found me and I decided to make here my friend. It was nice Outside back then. In fact, I had to find places to cool off. Since then, I’ve been an Inside kinda guy. I think they think I’m gonna leave or something but why would I leave the deal I’ve got right now??
So, here we are, me and The Old Guy; back Outside.
It did not feel good.
He had smoke coming out of his mouth and nose. Then I realized I had smoke coming out my nose. I barely have a nose. This could not be good. Then, I felt strange. Like… like I was, I hate to say it, naked. Now I don’t even know what that means, but for sure I didn’t feel like I had any hair on my body. I did not like this. This “cold” they called it.
So I did what any good Cat-Dog would do.
As soon as The Old Guy got me back on the Inside, I ran and got under the “big box” where he and The Nice Lady lie down and watch the “picture box” on the wall before they get still for a while and sometimes make odd noises until one or the other sits up and says, “Stop snoring!” Not sure what snoring is, but both The Old Guy and The Nice Lady seem to really hate it when it happens.
So, what is a Cat-Dog to do? I want to be “Outside”. I see it and remember it and it looks fun when the Dog-Cats are out there looking goofy and rolling around. While I’ll never reduce myself to their behavior I can see myself maybe stretching out and lying there under the bright yellow ball up there in the outside that makes things warm. But if it’s gonna be “cold”, count me out. Now that I’ve found the “Inside” world, I’m pretty good with it. Even if I have to put up with the three Dog-Cats who have no respect whatsoever for sitting in boxes. By the way, I’m not sure what Amazon is but they make the greatest boxes. As long as The Nice Lady keeps having them bring those Amazon boxes for me, I’m not going anywhere. No matter how strange The Young Man’s room smells.
Did I mention that? Well, next week I’ll have to tell you why I’m more worried about getting trapped in The Young Man’s room than getting stuck on the Outside with the Cold. Let’s just say there are some smells even a Cat-Dog can’t make sense of.
The Old Guy is looking at me like he wants his Writing-Box back. I should go sit in a box now. See you next time.
Scout, The Cat-Dog.
